Beauty in the Wilderness

 

“Sometimes we have to get lost before we find the beauty that surrounds us. It can take going to the hard places, the desolate places, the painful places, for us to find joy. Sometimes we have to hit rock bottom before we can find the solid ground of our being.”

I came across this quotation in my notes and I confess I have “lost” the source, even googling it didn’t get good results so please forgive me as I hone in on what I find to be its wisdom.

As Lent begins this year I have been constantly reminded of a few things: mercy, mapless territory, and beauty. I have prayed about how these terms might be speaking to me right now and am trying this on:

I am in a wilderness territory as I/we begin a new phase of our lives. The word retirement does not quite describe things as I find myself busier than ever and honoring my priesthood in new and life-giving ways. But mapless does describe it!

I don’t have many entries in my calendar at least not familiar ones, though there is a certain cleanness on the pages.

I don’t know where the grocery store is, though I am consoled by the certainty of Dunkin Donuts on every corner!

I don’t know the best places to walk the dog, though she enjoys just about anything!

I don’t know where my book on Beauty is in the boxes stacked high, so I have to loosen my reliance on books!

So the irony is that when I pause with no map in hand and embrace a certain lostness I notice some amazingly beautiful things! Every morning I witness a breathtaking dawn over the bay! More often than ever before I am able to witness the beautiful faces of my grandchildren. And more often than ever before I find myself just sitting breathing and cuddling the adorable puppy asleep on my lap! 

Somehow these beautiful blessings penetrate the uncertainty of being lost. Somehow they are my new bearings. 

And mercy? well mercy is that kindness emitted toward and from my soul which seems to act as a nightlight illuminating those previously unforeseen blessings.